MAY 4, 2008 SERMON:

THE PRAYER OF RELEASE

The Lord’s Prayer

Part 6

Pastor Russ

A young man goes into a drug store to buy 3 boxes of chocolate. The pharmacist says what size.  "Well," he said, "I’ve been seeing this beautiful girl for a while and tonight we’re having dinner with her parents, and then we’re going out. If she lets me hold her hand I’m going to give her a small box if she let’s me kiss her on the cheek I’m going to giver her a medium box and if she lets me kiss her on the lips I’m going to give her a big box. The young man makes his purchase and leaves. Later that evening, he sits down to dinner with his girlfriend and her parents. He asks if he might give the blessing, and they agree. He begins the prayer, but continues praying for several minutes. The girl leans over and says, "You never told me that you were such a religious person." He leans over to her and says, "You never told me that your father is a pharmacist."   

We’ve been studying The Lord’s Prayer verse by verse and we’ve learned  the two greatest barriers to peace of mind are guilt and resentment.  Guilt comes from what we do to other people.  Resentment comes from what other people do to us. 

Last week we talked about guilt and that the only antidote to guilt is really to receive the forgiveness of God.  In the same way the only antidote to resentment is to offer the forgiveness of God to other people. 

Today we’re going to look at what I call The Prayer of Release.  It is the next phrase in the Lord’s Prayer.  In Matthew 6:12 last week we looked at the first part of it.  This week we’ll look at the second half.  “Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.” 

In life you’re going to be hurt many times; sometimes intentionally and sometimes unintentionally.  Much more important than your hurt is how you choose to respond to it.  The only way you can get inner peace when you’ve been hurt is to let it go, to forgive.

So this brings up the question, how much do I have to forgive?  Peter asked that question about 2000 years ago.  In Matthew 18:21 Peter asks Jesus, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me?  Up to seven times?” 

In Jewish law you only had to forgive a person three times.  According to Jewish law, once a person had sinned against you the fourth time you no longer had to forgive them. 

And Jesus answers back in the next verse, “Peter, not seven times but 77 times?”  He’s basically saying there is no limit to forgiveness.  He’s saying if you’re counting how many times you forgive that means you’re keeping score and that’s not really forgiveness in the first place.

Jesus tells a story in Matthew 18 called The Parable of the Unforgiving Servant.  In this story He illustrates why we must learn to forgive.  He starts off like this in verse 23 “Therefore the king of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants.  As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him.”  

The king says, everyone who owes me any money, bring them all in and we’re going to settle the accounts right now.  They bring in this one guy who owes, in today’s money, about twelve million dollars.  He is hopelessly in over his head.

In those days bankruptcy was a whole lot simpler than it is today.  In the next verse it says “Since he was not able to pay the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.” 

Notice the servant’s response:  “The servant fell on his knees before him.  ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay everything back.’”  This was hilarious.  If he paid back $1000 a day for thirty years that still wouldn’t equal twelve million bucks. 

The king’s response: “So the servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.”  You can go Scot free.  You are forgiven.”  Why would anybody be that forgiving? 

I don’t know what grudge you’re carrying.  I don’t know who’s hurt you in the past.  I don’t know what memory haunts you.  Regardless of what you’ve been through, regardless how you’ve been hurt, you’ve got to let it go.

Why in the world should you let it go?  They hurt me.  They hurt me bad.  I don’t want to let it go.  I don’t want to forget it.  I want to hold on to that hurt and I want to hold on to my anger and resentment against them. 

You’ve got to let it go for three reasons that Jesus tells in this story.

1.  Because God has forgiven me. 

The master canceled the debt and he let him go.  That’s quite a gift.  He was released from twelve million dollars of debt.  That’s nothing compared to how much God’s forgiven you.  The truth is you owe God more than you’ll ever be able to repay. 

God says, I’m going to wipe the slate clean and you are completely forgiven.  Romans 8:1 says, “There is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.” 

Now God expects you to do to others what He has done to you.  If you want to be forgiven by God, God expects you to forgive others.  Think about this guy in the story.  He has just been forgiven a twelve million-dollar debt. 

How would you feel if all of a sudden every debt in your life was wiped out?  You had no house payment, no car payments, no credit card payments.  You would probably feel relief and joy.  You might feel a little gratitude, I hope.  And hopefully you would feel gracious to others. 

But that’s not what this guy did in the story.  “When this servant who had just been forgiven twelve million dollars went out.  He found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denari.  He grabbed him and began to choke him.  ‘Pay back what you owe me,’ he demanded.  His fellow servant fell to his knees and begged, ‘Please be patient with me and I will pay you back,’ But he refused.  Instead he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt.”

Get this guy!  He demands repayment of a hundred denari, (that’s seventeen bucks) and chokes the guy.  In Roman law you were allowed to choke somebody who owed you money.  Squeeze it out of him. 

Why in the world was this guy so harsh?  He was probably used to earning approval.  When we feel unforgiven we tend to be unforgiving. Many of you don’t understand grace.  You’re thinking, “I’m going to earn God’s forgiveness. 

Any time you find somebody really judgmental and hyper critical, they’re unforgiving, unbending, rigid and they’re unloving.  They’re always putting people down and they’re always judgeing others because they have unresolved guilt. 

To be able to forgive those who hurt you, you need to remember how much you’ve been forgiven.  No condemnation.  God is not mad at you.  He wiped out all your sin when you put your trust in Christ.  You will never have to forgive anybody else more than God has already forgiven you. 

“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other just as in Christ, God forgave you.” 

2.  Resentment makes me miserable.

Some of you have been hurt by people in the past and you’re continuing to allow them to hurt you.  That’s dumb.  They can only hurt you if you choose to continue to hold on to resentment.  Forgiveness is not a feeling.  Forgiveness is a choice.  For your own good let it go, not because they deserve it. 

Holding on to resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.  The people you resent are going on with their life.  They’re having a great old time.  You’re letting them continue to hurt you.  That’s dumb.

When this king heard what this guy he had forgiven did, he was livid.  He brings the unforgiving servant in and says this to him in verse 33 “’Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?’  And in anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured.” 

Here’s the point.  Nothing tortures your life more than resentment.  It is a poison that is worse than cancer.  It will eat you alive.  Resentment robs you of peace and joy.  It messes you up physically, spiritually and emotionally. 

According to Heart Circulation magazine,  people carrying resentment are twice as likely to have a stroke, three times more likely to have a heart attack or bypass surgery, and four times more likely to have unhealthy cholesterol.  Stanford researchers have linked carrying a grudge to higher levels of diabetes and cancer. 

Job 21 says this, “Some men stay happy until the day they die.  Others have no happiness at all.  They live and die with bitter hearts.”  If you want to be happy, you’ve got to let it go.  You cannot be bitter and happy at the same time.  You cannot have peace and resentment at the same time. 

So the question is what are you holding on to that’s torturing you?  If you don’t know who you need to forgive; here are three tests. 

          First is the blame test.  Who are you blaming for your unhappiness?  “If this hadn’t happened then my life would be terrific…  If I didn’t have these parents…”  Whoever you’re blaming for your unhappiness you need to forgive and let it go. 

          The second test is the bitterness test.  You keep a score.  Anytime somebody does something good you remember all the bad things they’ve done too so you’re always balancing how you feel about them. 

Some of you may have a spouse who made a major mistake – maybe years ago.  And you hold it over their heads.  You keep referring to it consciously or unconsciously.  And anytime that spouse does anything nice for you, you think, “They owe it to me.”  You are killing your marriage.  Not them. 

It is not the sin that’s killing the marriage.  It’s your stubborn refusal to let it go.  Your resentment, your holding on to it so that no matter what they do, it’s never good enough.

Some of you feel cheated by your marriage.  You have a partner who hasn’t lived up to your expectations.  Guess what?  They’re probably a little disappointed too.  You say, “But I have all these unmet needs that my husband/wife has not met.”  Resentment is killing your marriage.  It’s not the problem killing it. 

          The third test is the behavior test.  This one goes like this: You’ve never settled some issue so you take all that resentment out  on an innocent party that reminds you of somebody else.  That’s not fair. 

You need to let it go and then you can get on with your life and not let it destroy your current relationship.  Maybe it’s a former spouse or whatever.  Let it go!

Job 5:2 says “To worry yourself to death with resentment would be a foolish, senseless thing to do.” 

In this story when the man refused to be forgiving to other people the king says “Throw him into prison and let the torturers have him.”  When you start being resentful God doesn’t have to throw you into prison.  You do it to yourself. 

Every time you remember over and over and over in your mind you just torture yourself again.  I don’t know what you’ve gone through but you’ve got to let it go.  God has forgiven you and resentment doesn’t work.  It only makes you miserable and prolongs the pain. 

But there’s a third reason why you’ve got to let it go.

3.  I’m going to need forgiveness again.

Jesus says in Matthew 18:35 “This is how My heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”  We cannot receive what we’re unwilling to give.  If you want forgiveness you’ve got to offer forgiveness.  This is the prayer of release. 

Do you realize what you’re praying when you pray the Lord’s prayer?  “God, I want you to forgive me as much as I forgive everybody else.”  Do we really want to pray that prayer? 

One day a man said to John Wesley, “I can never forgive that man!”  Wesley said, “Then I hope you never sin.”  Forgiveness is a two way street.  Don’t burn the bridge you need to get to heaven. 

Notice it says “This is how My heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”  He’s saying forgiveness has to be more than intellectual.  It has to be emotional.  You have to emotionally let it go. 

In Matthew 5:7 Jesus said, “Blessed are the merciful for they will be shown mercy.”  Do you want mercy in your life?  You’ve got to show it.  What you give out you will get back. 

Forgiveness must be continual and it must be constant.  You must ask forgiveness, you must offer forgiveness and you must accept forgiveness.  Forgiveness is the hallmark of Christian.  And if you won’t forgive don’t call yourself a Christian. 

You’ve already been hurt a lot.  And you’re going to be hurt some more.  When you get hurt you only have two options:  rehearse it or release it.  You can go over and over and over in your mind and every time you do you drive that thorn deeper in your heart. 

It hurts more and more and more every time you rehearse it.  And you allow that person from your past to control your present by choosing to let them keep you under their control by resentment. 

Or you can release it.  Rehearsing it just perpetuates the pain.  Releasing it is the path to inner peace.  “Forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors.”  Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who have sinned against us.  That is the path to peace.

Job 11 says this, “Put your heart right.  Reach out to God.  Then face the world again, firm and courageous, and all your troubles will fade from your memory like floods that are past and remembered no more.” 

Prayer:

       Father, I’m sure that this message has stirred up some painful memories that need to be dealt with.  There is no doubt in my mind there are many people who have been locked up in a self-imposed prison of anger and resentment and bitterness.  Help them to experience freedom today.  Help them to let it go. 

       Who do you need to release today?  Who do you need to forgive?  As you think of that person follow me in this prayer:  “Dear God, only You know how much I hurt.  And only You know how much I’ve hurt others.  God, I know I need to let it go so I cry out and ask for Your strength to forgive.  Thank You for forgiving me.  I know that I will never have to forgive anybody else more than You have forgiven me.  And I know that bitterness hurts me the most.  And I know that I need Your forgiveness every day.  So today I am choosing to let it go regardless of how I feel. 

I realize that forgiveness is a choice not an emotion, not a feeling.  I don’t feel like forgiving but I’m going to because it’s the right thing.  And every time that memory comes back help me to keep on letting it go until the pain is gone.  Lord Jesus, I reach out to You for Your help.  I ask You to come into my life and give me a fresh start as I follow You.  In Your name I pray.  Amen.